Cary and Randy - just together

People who knew them early in their careers said Cary Grant and Randolph Scott lived openly gay lives behind closed doors, but, as was the case with many actors, arranged marriages were the order of the day. Studios had to protect their financial properties and interests. The name "Bachelor Hall" and the reported parade of women through there was orchestrated by the studios, who wanted to keep their valuable actors away from any scandal.

I’ll have a blue Christmas without you

As this yuletide time approaches

with its season of good cheer,

midst colored lights and tinsel;

I try hard to persevere.

There was a time I welcomed Christmas

with glad tidings from the start;

but sadness now envelopes me,

for you left and broke my heart.

I'll just forget the holiday,

no cheer for me this year.

So solemn now I trudge along,

trying not to shed a tear.

A Period of Adjustment

When a relationship ends, it’s normal to move through a painful period of adjustment. If you sprained your ankle, you would cut yourself some slack, and take time out to heal. Many folks are reluctant to handle psychological pain as they do the physical. This “healing time” can be a perfect opportunity to learn to live alone, enjoy being independent and by yourself.  Many come to cherish this time of self exploration and freedom. They can do what they want – when they want – without having to compromise. Most say that once they get settled into this lifestyle, ironically, it’s then they connect with someone else that’s a much better match for them.

A Beautiful Image

Every life is touched by happiness, joy, good times and bad, and a million other bits and pieces. Too often we focus only on certain parts and allow them to define who we are. But we are so much more than a few individual experiences.

The beauty and magic of thinking of life as a kaleidoscope is that we can take all of the moments of our lives, the good, the bad, and even the ugly –

shuffle the sparkly bits and pieces together and create a spectacularly beautiful image.  

We have the power to embrace the metaphor of a kaleidoscope, to keep moving, growing, and seeing the beauty in each new perspective as a natural part of our journey to becoming the person we are meant to be. 

Desperate

Words can inflict emotional pain...

Verbal abuse happens when a partner or family member uses verbal assault or humiliation to undermine another person's self-esteem and self-worth. These behaviors  can create emotional pain and mental anguish and are every bit as damaging as physical abuse. After exposure to verbal abuse, victims may develop clinical depression or other stress-related illnesses. Typically, in romantic or family relationships, verbal abuse increases in intensity and frequency over time. Anger underlies, motivates and perpetuates verbally abusive behavior.

If you are repeatedly exposed to verbal abuse from a partner it may be necessary to temporarily or permanently end the relationship. If the abuser is a family member, or friend who is part of your larger social network the only way to avoid the abuse—or at least minimize its damaging effects—is to limit contact with the abuser or only interact with them in public when surrounded by non-abusive people.

Inside my Memory Book

Inside my memory book,

you come alive.

With the turn of every page

I hear the laughter in your voice,

and see your noble face

Our past is present for me now.

I can feel an evening breeze,

as starlight and moon glow

dazzle us with summer magic.

We sit side by side 

to talk and talk –

like two poets reading verse aloud.

I hear your words, 

and try hard to retrieve them all –

to make them my own.

I remember a trip

on my twenty- first birthday.

The clickety-clack of the rails

still echoes in my head.

We’d dreamt so long of flying free.

Now the cage had opened and

sweet freedom called our names.

Breathing heavy in the twilight,

we inhaled joy and wonder

Life lessons filled our souls.

Now as your face eases

back into the shadows

of my mind’s eye

I smile and hide

all the pain

I feel inside

but tears still come

from my heart.

I loved you then,

and I love you now.